The weather is changing and I feel my life changing along with it. I feel myself changing in the most positive way. I am welcoming new adventures and the new power that I have been searching for inside of me is finally revealing itself.
Last weekend was full of adventures. I did something that I have always wanted to do! I finally saw John Carpenter’s 1978 Halloween on the big screen! For the last couple of years, it has been my mission to watch this film in theaters. It gets rereleased every year on selected days but the timing never worked out. I always had to work or the theater was just too far or it was sold out. A lot of times, it was sold out. Finally, I got my chance this past weekend. This is one of my favorite horror films. It just puts me in the Halloween spirit. I love the slow long shots while the trees are dancing in the wind. The fall leaves fly in the air as Laurie Strode walks home from school. It’s crazy that such a simple concept like babysitting can make such a great horror movie.
I didn’t have the luxury of reclining chairs at this theater but that’s okay. I sat in the center and watched with excitement. The audience was great too. It’s like everyone was holding their breaths as they were watching. There were little giggles here and there at the absurd movements of Michael Myers but all were respectful. In the end, I clapped loudly and so did others. Every year when I watch this movie, I have this urge to create something just as great but it never happens.
Another thing I did this weekend that I have always wanted to do is see a comedy show at Flappers. I got tickets for the afternoon show. There were only six people in the audience and there were three comics. I am not much of a comedy person. It can take a lot to make me laugh but I wanted to be a good sport and tried my best to giggle. One of the comics was a self-promoter comic and kept going on and on about his podcast. The other comic was love to make fun of himself and talk about Star Wars. It takes guts to get up there so coodles to them. I had fun overall and it was a great experience. I had a cup of coffee and some really expensive root beer. I even won tickets to another show which is pretty exciting.
I also attended Toon Con as a floor manager/volunteer while running my own booth at the same time. It was my first time at this convention. In the evening, my family had a party for my new baby niece. It was nerve-wracking thinking about seeing my extended family but it ended up not being horrible. I was able to get through the night. I was exhausted but I got through it.
I am starting a new position with the school district as an ESL teacher. My hours are less than what I am doing now. I am excited to be off my first job at 12ish every day. I have no real experience with ESL so I am nervous. It wasn’t what I wanted to do but a door opened and I decided to take it. I am tired of the lack of respect for substitutes from students and from the administration. I am ready to move on. I am praying that this ends up being a good opportunity. I just don’t want it to be a worse gig. I am going to try my best to be positive about it. I have been ramming my brain about other goals too. The coffee/tea cart has been resurfacing in my mind. I found a potential location. It’s challenging trying to figure out what is going to work best for me. I am tired of planning and thinking about it. I want to jump in. I just don’t want to chicken out.
Marvel’s new show about Werewolves looks pretty amazing. I feel like I am going to have this burst of inspiration to create and I hope I do. I want to feel inspired again.
Yesterday as I was running on the treadmill, I had this burst of energy. I couldn’t believe I ran for twenty-five mins at a pretty fast pace well fast for me at least! I did something a bit different on my run this time. I listened to music instead of the Spinsterhood podcast. It made a difference but also, and my body felt rested. I had taken a break from doing my morning walks the last two days. Also, my serving job was pretty slow yesterday so when I went to the gym after work, I had energy. While I was running, I had a fantasy I sometimes have. The fantasy usually involves a speech for winning an Oscar for a story I have directed, written, and produced about my parents. I see myself on the stage with my parents. I accept the award with grace. I thank God first and that’s all I have planned so far. It’s silly I know and it will never happen. I do hope I can start writing the novel about parents soon. I think right after Bla Bla Land, I will work on that story next. It’s exciting to plot out my next writing project.
Inspiration is great but doing nothing with it hurts me. As much as I was trying to get the coffee/tea cart moving, I couldn’t help but feel extremely overwhelmed and frustrated with myself. I am trying my best to just take it day by day. I am trying not to get overwhelmed. I keep reminding myself that I have a beautiful life full of love and good health. That is all I need. The rests are wants and aspirations and things I don’t necessarily need.
Happy Spooky season everyone! I plan on making some time to watch SMILE and Halloween Ends. What will you be doing to celebrate this spooky month?
I want to keep progressing and doing better.