It is so easy to lay in bed all day and make a million excuses why I shouldn’t get up. Most of the time, the excuses aren’t bullshit. They are legit reasons why I am not up for getting up.
Here is an example…tonight, my feet ached from wearing heels this morning and nonslip crocs to wait on tables in the evening. It has been three days straight with these two different types of shoes on. They ache so badly. I just wanted to go home tonight after a decently busy shift at the restaurant. I had a long day with my students and my brain and body and my feet wanted to rest. That wasn’t a good enough reason for me to not hit the gym right after work. I thought of some more reasons to skip the gym. I have to write the blog tonight, I have reading to do for work, I have to respond to some pressing emails and I need to be in bed at a decent hour because I have to wake up at 7 am the next day to do it all over again. In the past, this would have been enough for me to not go to the gym. It didn’t work tonight. I skipped the gym on Monday because I had to work late, therefore, I had to go tonight. I have committed to the gym three nights out of the week. I compromise with myself. If I go for at least three days for at least twenty minutes then the other four days I can focus on some kind of outdoor workouts like a long walk or a hike. I know three days for twenty minutes isn’t much but it is for me. More than anything, I want to make it a habit and to be more disciplined.
That is our key word here. Discipline. I need more of it.
If I can get my act together then I will find success.
I struggle with discipline.
I start something, but I fall off the boat.
I feel bad when I fail because I want to be better so badly.
I try my best to eat healthily and exercise.
It’s hard to start. Once I am in the flow then things get easier.
It becomes a habit to be healthy.
Yet, there are times that I just fail badly, and I can’t get back on track.
Mostly, when I have a weekend of cheat meals or when I feel like I haven’t had any results.
Right now, I am trying so hard to eat better and to exercise. I have not seen any significant results. It makes me sad. It makes me want to just give up and eat the delicious mochi donuts that I have been craving, but that won’t make me feel any better. It will make me feel worse like I am a hundred steps away from my goal.
Every week, I am trying to master one form of discipline that my life needs. This week it is to stop eating before 7 pm. I am also trying to eat more vegetables every day. I purchased some steamable veggies for lunch. This way, I have my food and I won’t be spending unnecessary money on outside food that isn’t even good for me.
I feel if I can get my health in order then everything else will start to feel a little bit easier.
Writing my blog every week has become something that I am very much disciplined in. I want to continue writing every day. Now that I am in the habit of writing every week for the blog, I want to start working on my grammar. I know my writing can be hard to read and English isn’t my strength. That’s fine. I truly believe that I have no talent, I just work my butt off.
Another form of discipline for me is to get out of my comfort zone. My city, Los Angeles, has so many cool things about it. I was born and raised here, yet I haven’t explored my own city. There are many reasons for that. I will say that my days are super full and when I have downtown, I enjoy watching stuff. I enjoy being a potato but lately, I have been shaking up the box, and let me tell you that it has been a ball. I am enjoying it. This past weekend I explored the Neon Museum and found Sawtelle Japantown. I tried new foods and took walks. I think the Portuguese cafe has been my favorite find on my walks so far. I took a new hiking route at Griffth Park and enjoyed the views. I’ve been trying new coffee and tea shops for research and it has been delicious. I played a game of Magic the Gathering..that wasn’t exploring but it was new. I spent time looking through books at the book store and that just made me mad because I don’t read enough. I went to my first over priced cat cafe even though I have four cats of my own. LOL
It is so hard for me to explore because I am a creature of habit but once I do it…I am always feel good. I feel alive and I am excited about the new memories. Also, I try so hard to save money and it can be expensive going out. Honestly though, I have been saving for so long that I just want to indulge but I tell myself moderation is key!
Again, I want to be better so badly.
I want to find the drive inside of me to pursue my goals.
I want to reach my inner Rocky Balboa.
I might want to do too much but I have one life and it’s passing by.
I want to be part of something special.
I want to be special.
Someone take me under your wing and show me the way.