I had a wonderful weekend full of friends, good food, and exploring. Of course, there were some hiccups. It started with loud construction in the house because my father was renovating the roof and the driveway. The banging started on the roof at 7am on a Saturday morning. I was tired and cold. Since the gas bill has tripled in Los Angeles, we have been more frugal regarding turning on the heat. The bill has skyrocketed. I woke up to banging on the roof, my nephew running around the house while my sister was yelling at him to stop before he got hurt, my parents were arguing over the construction, and my mom’s cell phone was ringing. It was chaotic. My dad likes to follow construction people around the house and ensure they are doing the job right, but my mom tells him to let them do their job, a tale as old as time.

I had a lot of work to complete from the three professional development classes that I accidentally took on at the same time. I decided to go to Starbucks and get some work done. I did not have breakfast yet, so I thought I might stop by Hanks ( a bagel spot), which I have always wanted to try. I was excited about my morning adventure, but at the same time, I felt guilty for leaving. I felt terrible about leaving my mom behind to handle the chaos. I would spend my morning working on my professional development and having breakfast while she was at home dealing with so many annoying situations. I wish I could help with her stress, but I have learned that I can’t carry my mom’s or anyone’s problems. I have my own issues and need to work on them daily.

It gave me peace to remember that I did spend time with my mom during the week, and although it wasn’t an abundance of time, it was still time that I didn’t have with her before.

So I drove to Hanks, parked at the two-hour parking, and walked over. It was crowded, but I was expecting that. There were folks with their kids and doggies waiting for food or a seat to clear up. It was such a beautiful day, and I was excited! I know it is the little things in life for me. I ordered an egg everything bagel with super greens toasted, a black coffee, and of course, I grabbed a chocolate chip cookie. Those are my guilty pleasures. I get one any time I see them. I am hunting for the best chocolate chip cookie in the valley. LOL.I waited for a table to clear up. The tables were outside, and there were only about five of them. I waited about five minutes when a table cleared up and sat down. I took out the new book I am reading called The Nightingale by Kristin Hannah. It has been hard to get into, but it is supposed to be a New York Times bestseller. I read a few pages when I food came out. I thanked the gentlemen that dropped it off and to have my breakfast. It wasn’t good, guys, but I still enjoyed it. I enjoyed being there and trying it out. I ate around the greens and enjoyed the everything bagel. I thought about ordering a simple bagel with a cream but decided against it. The coffee was too bitter, and the cookie was too sweet, and I had to rush since people were waiting to be seated. It was fine, though. I had the best time. I headed to the Starbucks next door when I got a visit from my bestie. We chatted it up, and then I did some work. It was a great morning. We decided to try a new Cheeseburger place that we have both driven by a million times. The burgers were simple but tasty.

During the rest of my weekend, I spent time with friends and exploring new areas even though I had a ton of work to do. I was feeling tired and lazy, but I pushed myself.

When I have weekends like these, it makes me want to have more free time to enjoy life. I never understood why people would want to be rich, but right now, I understand that if money wasn’t an issue, I would have so much time to do whatever I wanted. I have been learning a lot about the power of visualization. I always stop myself from visualizing anything because I think it is unhealthy. I always visualized something terrible or something extraordinary that doesn’t seem possible. For example, someone I love dying or winning an Oscar for my film. See? Both of these are horrible in their own ways. My thoughts are extreme, and I am working on visualizing small goals like waking early to work. It is still a new concept, but I am working on it.

A prayer

Allah, I thank you for every second of life, including the good and the bad moments. I thank you for the powerful emotions that pierce my heart because being numb brings emptiness. I want my life to always feel full of love and peace. God, please continue to guide me in the directions that you seem most fit and peaceful. Letting go and letting you take control has been challenging for me, but I have already seen the drastic results when I let you take control and guide my spirit. Allah, thank you, thank you, and thank you for everything this past month. I know some days were hard, but other days were magnificent. Continue to guide me, lord, and show me the way so I can follow. Ameen.



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